New Post #2

In today this Newsletter

1. Arrival Fallacy: Why happiness always seems out of reach

2. Therapist vs Coach

3. Movies

4. Trending

5. As seen on Legit.ng

Arrival Fallacy: Why Happiness Always Seems Out of Reach

On Monday, I decided to watch one of Ali Abdaal’s Youtube videos titled: it is time to wake up.

I was feeling down a bit on that very day, so I need a lit bit of motivation and I figured the video should it.

P.S: Ali Abdaal is a popular Youtuber that talks about Productivity and how Time can be utilized to the fullest.

During the video he made mention of the phrase “Start Where You Are”, which is a chapter from the popular book Designing your life by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans. Ali Abdaal made references to the chapter where he discovered the word Arrival fallacy.

Here is a little article on Arrival fallacy.

Have you ever felt like you’re constantly striving for something more, thinking that happiness and fulfillment are just around the corner? Only to find that, even when you achieve your goals, that sense of satisfaction is fleeting?

You’re not alone. This phenomenon is known as the Arrival Fallacy, a psychological trap that keeps us perpetually chasing an elusive dream.

Now what is Arrival Fallacy?

Arrival Fallacy is the belief that once we achieve a certain goal or milestone, we will finally be happy or content. We assume that arrival at this destination will bring us lasting fulfillment. But, more often than not, that’s not the case.

Why does this happen?

· Our brains are wired to adapt to new circumstances, making the novelty of our achievement wear off quickly.

· We tend to focus on the next goal, rather than appreciating what we have already accomplished.

· External validation and social comparison can fuel our dissatisfaction.

How to break free from the Arrival Fallacy.

· Practice gratitude and mindfulness to appreciate the present moment.

· Set intrinsic goals that bring joy, rather than extrinsic validation.

· Embrace the journey, not just the destination.

Conclusion

The truth is Arrival Fallacy is a common pitfall, but recognizing it can help us reframe our pursuit of happiness. We always have to accept where we are and be unjudgmental about our current situation.

In pursuit of happiness, we should focus and enjoy every step of the journey and always find meaning in the present. That way we can always break free from the cycle of constant striving and find fulfillment that lasts.

Therapist vs Coach

During the week, a colleague of mine at work was talking about a therapist but the descriptions she was giving was that of a Life Coach. After she landed, I told her the descriptions are that of a Life Coach and not a therapist. She argued for a while, then asked to give a brief definition of the two.

Here is my answer.

A therapist really focuses on the past and tries to figure out why you are the way you are. But a coach teaches you to accept the way you are and guides you to become a better version of yourself.

Funny enough she was still not convinced by my answer, so I had to do a bit of sketchy research on the topic and this what I was able to gather.

Here is a detailed comparison between a Therapist and a Coach.

Therapist:

· A therapist is a licensed healthcare professional.

· Focuses on mental health diagnosis, treatment and management.

· Explores past experiences, emotions and behaviors to understand and address underlying issues.

· May prescribe medications (depending on their license).

· Typically works with clients dealing with mental health conditions like anxiety, depression, trauma etc.

· May use evidence-based therapies like CBT, DBT, or psychodynamic therapy.

Coach:

· Not necessarily a licensed healthcare professional (though some may have a background in psychology or related fields.

· Focuses on personal growth, development and goal achievement.

· Explores present circumstances, goals, and desires to create a plan for success.

· Does not diagnose or treat mental health conditions

· Works with client seeking improvement in areas like relationships, career, wellness or life transition.

· May use various coaching models and techniques such as positive psychology or solution focused coaching.

Key differences

· Licenses and credentials

· Focus (mental health vs. personal growth)

· Scope of practice (diagnosis and treatment vs. goal-oriented support).

· Approach 9exploring past vs focusing on present and future)

Remember, while there’s some overlap, therapists and coaches serve distinct purposes, if you are struggling with mental health concerns, seek a therapist. For personal growth and development, consider a coach.

Movies

Funmilayo Ransome Kuti.

This week was hectic and boring is some ways, I didn’t get to watch movies the way I wanted. But I plan to remedy that this weekend. One of the movies I will be watching is Funmilayo Ransome Kuti a Nollywood movie to be precise. I am not a fan of Nigeria made movies but I sure do make exceptions for the good ones and this is one of the.

Growing up the only fact we know about Mrs Funmilayo Ransome Kuti was that she is the first woman to drive a car, at least that’s what we were taught in school. Then we later realized she is the mother of a Nigerian music idol Fela Kuti popular known as Baba Fela.

Here is a brief article on the Nollywood Movie.

Title: Funmilayo Ransome-Kuti: The Lioness of Lisabi.

Nollywood’s latest biopic, Funmilayo Ransome Kuti, tells the inspiring story of Fela Kuti’s mother, a pioneering figure in Nigeria’s struggle for independence and women’s rights. The film follows Funmilayo’s journey from her early days as a student at Abeokuta Grammer School to her marriage to Isreal Ransome Ruti and her subsequent rise as a leading activist.

Played by Joke Silver, Funmilayo Ransome Kuti chronicles her life’s work, including the establishment of the Abeokuta Women’s Union, her fight against colonial and traditional rulers, and her unwavering dedication to women’s empowerment. The movie highlights her remarkable leadership, which forced the Alake to temporarily abdicate in 1949 temporarily.

A fitting tribute to a Nigerian icon, Funmilayo Ransome Kuti is a movie that will leave you in awe of this remarkable woman’s life and legacy. Don’t miss it, cos I will be watching it also this weekend.

House of Dragons S2E2

Episode 2 was released on Monday. Though I didn’t get to watch it the way I want. I literally finished the episode bit by bit, so it cut short the joy in watching it. If you are yet to watch the new episode, try to download and watch it this weekend.

Trending…..

A lot happened during the week in the world of Nigeria social media space. But there is this particular one that last the whole week. Yeah, I know you have an idea of what I am talking about already. So lets dive into it.

#CHIVIDO 2024

June 25, 2024 in Lagos, we saw and witness what is likely to be the biggest wedding of the year so far. So big they created a hashtag for it on all social media platforms “#CHIVIDO2024”.

David Adeleke, popularly known as Davido, a 31-year-old Nigerian superstar tied the knot with his long-time partner, Chioma Rowlands.

The wedding ceremony was attended by not just big celebrities in Nigeria but also by dignitaries. I mean for these types of dignitaries to attend your ceremony it means you are big indeed, the Adeleke family is a big Family in Nigeria.

Some of the notable guests were:

· Olusegun Obasanjo, the former president of Nigeria.

· The current governor of Lagos state, Governor Babajide Sanwolu.

· Emmanuel Udom, the former governor of Akwa Ibom state.

· Senator Ademola Adeleke, Davido’s uncle and the Governor of Osun state.

· Oba Adeyeye Ogunwusi, the Ooni of Ife.

· Pascal Okechukwu, also known as Cubana Chief Priest, Davido’s Bestman for the day.

· Dele Momodu, a veteran journalist, and former PDP presidential aspirant.

· Olamide Badoo

· Fireboy and so on.

The newly wedded couple received many gifts both in cash and other luxurious assets. On that very day, the social media space was a total shut down.

P.S: Omo after watching many videos of the wedding, Poverty wan whine me small, but I no panic sha. We sef go get money one day.

Olamide new album (EP) – IKIGAI.

During the week, one of Nigeria legendary rapper and YBNL boss, Olamide Badoo released a new album into the music space named “IKIGAI”. The album is said to feature six Nigerian superstar artists like Fireboy DML, Asake, Lil Kesh and so on.

The Tracklist of the album “IKIGAI”

· Metaverse – Olamide.

· Uptown Disco – Olamide ft Fireboy DML and Asake.

· Makaveli – Olamide.

· Knockout – Olamide ft Sabri.

· Hello Habibi – Olamide.

· Morowore – Olamide.

· Synchro System – Olamide ft Pheelz, Young Jonn & Lil Kesh.

With the hype around the album and Olamide’s track record, we all know it is going to be a banger and favorites for weeks to come.

One more thing, we still have to ask Olamide where he gets his album titles from. Cos wtf is IKIGAI, same as his previous albums CARPE DIEM and UY SCUTI.  The names are not even English and are weird.

Benin Boys are in town.

If you at the type that listens to Rema’s music, then this Is for you. This week also saw the release of street banger “Benin Boys” by Rema and Shallipopi (Pluto Presido). With the two-superstars originating from benin, the combo was lit 🥵 . if you haven’t listened to the song, you should this weekend.

Obi Cubana vs Very Darkman

Late last week, a dispute between Obi Cubana a well-known Nigeria businessman and the popular social media personality Very Darkman.

Here is some information about the dispute between them.

· Very Darkman called out Obi Cubana for taking sides in his argument with Iyabo Ojo.

· Obi Cubana called very Darkman “a small, disrespectful boy” and accused bloggers of enabling him.

· Very Darkman accused Obi Cubana of showing off and not doing anything tangible for Nigeria youths

· Very Darkman also refused to apologize for his statement about Obi Cubana.

Other social media personalities intervened, the likes of Tunde Ednut, Samklef and so on.

Some even went to the extent of going live to have a say on the matter, someone like Portable. You can watch portable say on the matter through this link: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C8uKRSItByk/?igsh=YzljYTk1ODg3Zg==

As seen on Legit.ng

• Bisola Aiyeola, Nancy Isime, 3 other celebs slay effortlessly at Sharon Ooja's wedding, look classy. Read more 👉 https://read.legit.ng/4rnDQ

• BREAKING: Heated Session At House Of Reps Over Tinubu’s Request To Extend Budget Period. Read more here👉🏽: https://read.legit.ng/DrnP3

• Nigerian Army Promotes UK-Trained Female Officer to Lieutenant

  Read more here 👉 https://read.legit.ng/3rmDW

• FG Invites Nigerians to Apply for N50,000 Cash Grant, Releases Application Link. Read more here👉🏻: https://read.legit.ng/HrQu0

• Minimum Wage: Southern Governors Make Fresh Proposal. Read more here👉🏽: https://read.legit.ng/TrmVc

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That’s a Wrap! Thanks for joining me on this week newsletter. Stay curious, keep exploring, and let’s connect.

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Best, Faruk Adebayo